I am sitting in a hotel room in Minneapolis and it is -2 degrees outside.  The Mall of America is just minutes from my hotel and yet I am sitting here snuggled in my comforter.  The voice that shows up in my head says, “You should get up and get ready.  You should go do something.  Go see the roller coaster…experience life.  You should go check out this or that. You should go meet people.  You are here to do business…get up, go.” And while I would not be thrilled to go out into the frigid weather, that is not the reason I am sitting here still.

There is an energy out there that challenges each and every one of us.  The mentality of having to do more, be more, push to be better, accomplish and achieve, produce on all levels, and prove ourselves and our worth is at times damaging.  The nature of our immediate satisfaction world, coupled with our fast paced lives filled with texts and conversations and posts, creates pressure.  We often experience life in terms of “How would I post this on Facebook?  I have to take a picture for Instagram.”  We love it and we hate it.  I know I am not the only one that fills overwhelmed by the notifications, the emails, the voicemails, the calls at times.  I crave the connections and want to be a part of it, yet sometimes I just want to hide.

I have learned that it is hard for me to be still.  It is hard to disconnect and say, “I’m done.  I need to pull back.  I am regrouping over here and I am not going to push.  I am going to lean in to being still.”

Stillness is critical yet so uncomfortable.  Stillness is just being and feeling and listening.  Stillness is quieting the bossy voice inside and instead gently speaking to our spirit.  “It is good to be still.  Just be.  Just breathe.  Don’t reach for that phone.  It can all wait.  Right now we are just focused on being still.”

I am going to be still.  I have spent the last few years flying here or there, doing all I can, leaving no stone unturned.  I have lived every day to the max and thought that this was wholehearted living.  I thought if I did all I could do, and experienced everything possibly and didn’t waste a moment, I would eventually strike a balance.  I wanted to play full out and I did.  I have given everyone and everything all I had.  We have scheduled time for work and learned to schedule time for play. We made sure that there were times where we were having fun, believing that this would prevent burnout.  And it wasn’t bad, there was plenty of fun and I liked parts of it.

I believed that there was always more I could give because I had learned to rely so greatly on God.  If I didn’t have the desire or energy, He did.  And He came through so many times.  Things I have done would not have happened without his abundant help.  I am not sure at what point it happened, but somewhere along the way I became someone who never stopped, who decided things were okay even when they weren’t.  I pushed even when I didn’t want to.  I faced fears and I ignored my own needs thinking they were small and didn’t matter.  “It’s okay,” I would tell myself.  “I should be happy I get to do these things.  I will have time to relax later.  I can keep going.  It’s only a little bit of time…it will only take me a few minutes to do this for this person…it will be fine…I am happy, I am blessed, I am where I belong.”

And I sort of was, but not completely.  Imagine a symphony only playing in one loud dramatic volume.  It might be fun for a one song, but an entire concert of loud masterpieces would not satisfy the soul.  The best symphonies draw you in with crescendos and decrescendos.  You are able to feel the music in the quiet parts.  The variety of volume is critical to enjoying the experience and certain emotions can only be felt when it is quiet.

I have had a few friends in the last month announce on Facebook, “I’m disconnecting.  Things are fine, but I need to focus elsewhere.  I need to be away from my phone.  I will be back but I am taking a break for a few days.”  I respect that action but think it shows what a crazy world we live in when we have to announce that we need some space.  We all need to give ourselves permission to pull back, to slow down and to be still.  I think it would be awesome if we could just say, “Hey!  This is a still day for me.  I need to check out so I can come back refreshed.”  We could all support each other and say, “Yeah! Still days are the best!  You deserve it!  Enjoy! We will be here when you get back.  Don’t worry about responding to any of our messages and we won’t judge if you are being still for an extended period of time.”  Instead of just celebrating the weekend, we could celebrate Still Days.

Here is my problem, I think I swung so far to the side of being busy and producing and serviceable and engaged that now I crave a huge amount of stillness.  And it is the type of stillness that can’t be ignored. It started brewing last March when  I remember telling my husband, “If we do not disconnect in a major way this summer, I feel like I will snap.  It is critical for me to just have time off where I can’t be reached and where I can just be me.”

We made plans to disconnect from our lives in a big way.  We rented our San Diego home out to our beach-loving friends and we left for about 7 weeks.  We drove through California, Utah, Nevada, Arizona, and Idaho.  Justin flew to Oklahoma and Florida to teach a couple classes and I flew to Washington and Texas.  Then we took our entire family to Aruba for 2 weeks where we recharged.  I felt the trickles coming back in and I celebrated that we had been brave enough to listen to the voice inside that said it was time to rest.  We left Aruba and flew to Virginia where we visited a brand new niece and toured DC in a blitz. From DC, we flew to Atlanta and then drove to South Carolina to visit my Aunt’s bed and breakfast.  Although she hasn’t hung a shingle out, it is better than a real bed and breakfast.  She is a trained chef and we enjoyed her hospitality and the nearby beach. Back to Atlanta for a few business meetings, then finally a flight home to LA where we picked up our car and drove to San Diego.

A magical, unforgettable summer with plenty of breaks, lots of beach time, and a bit of work mixed in.  It was wonderful and yet, when we returned home, my cup was still not full.  Six months later I discovered why.  Although I had insisted upon pulling back and doing less, inside I had so much self judgement about that choice.

I felt bad that I was tapped out and could not give anymore.  I felt bad that I wanted to be still when sitting on a beach and didn’t even desire to chase my kids.  I felt good that I had gotten away but felt bad that I needed the break so bad.  And if you read the schedule we kept, it was both invigorating and exhausting.  And not one time last summer did I tell myself, “I need this.  I deserve this.  It is okay to be still.  Of course you don’t want to run on the beach and it is okay!”  I was never compassionate towards myself.

I justified the experience with thoughts like: “It is good to create family memories so it is okay that we are doing this.  It is giving me time to read and reconnect to God.  I am doing this so I will be ready to go again.”  Those things are all good and true but there was a layer of self-judgement in every city we visited.

I am retraining my thoughts.  I am embracing the days where I get to be still.  I am releasing the self judgement and practicing self compassion.  I am letting go of doing being and having, and just leaning in to the stillness.  I am seeing that God knew what we needed when he said, “Be Still and know that I God.”  He knew there would be people like me who would not know when to say, “Enough is enough.”  He knew that we would be in a busy world with all the contacts we could possibly want coming from a tiny little i-Phone.  He knew that we would crave success and peace and not know where to find it.  He knew that we would engage in good things and still not live whole heartedly.

“Be still and know that I am God.”  I always thought that meant to stop your worrying and trust God to handle things.  I think it also means to literally be still.  Stop. Rest. Be still and trust that He can watch over things for you.  Trust that if you need to be still, He is not going anywhere.  He will still love you because He is God.

He wants us to not just lean in to the stillness, but to actually lean in to Him.  And I thought I was doing that the last few years.  Before committing to working with clients or to being at an event, I would always check in with God.  I could close my eyes in an instant and know if the opportunity was a good fit for me.  But I quit checking in with myself.  I quit asking myself what I really wanted, thinking that if God was good with the plan, I would be good too.  I still think that is true, but I think we were given a brain and a heart that were meant to be used.  We were meant to be involved in our lives and to use our agency.   Now I am bringing my own feelings to the table, knowing that whatever I am feeling is okay and understood by God.  Now I can say, “I’m needing to be still, and I am going to let this one thing go.”I feel the peace come in and I know that God is with me.

When my spirit says, “I’m tired and I want to rest.” I am resting without judging myself for not being motivated to do more.  When my spirit says, “I don’t want to get dressed,”  I am saying a pajama day is okay.  When my spirit says, “I am scared,” I am asking questions and being gentle with myself. When I think, “It’s too cold to go outside!  I don’t want to go anywhere!” I am looking a little deeper.  I am doing a heart check and asking myself what I am really feeling.

I acknowledge that I don’t love the cold here in Minneapolis, but really I want to sit in my little hotel room and just be still. The need to be still is greater than my dislike of cold and snow.   The old me would say, “You have all this time away from kids!  Do the things you can’t get done with them – launch that program, make those calls, go run the errands you can’t get done! Go, go, go!!!”  The new me recognizes that while I don’t get as much done when I am surrounded by my littles, I also don’t rest as much.  With three children and a busy family, still moments are few and far between and a still day is nearly unheard of.  It makes perfect sense to me that when I know they are taken care of and I have a comfy bed to sit in, I would want to just be still.  It is okay for me to lean in to the stillness.

I have discovered that half my problem with being still was the judgments I was making towards myself in those moments.  When we step into self judgement, we do not feel peaceful, accepted, loved, or loving.  It is natural to judge ourselves, but I believe we have to take the next step of self compassion.  Learning and practicing self compassion has helped me to be braver, to love myself and other more, and to be okay with it is happening right now in the moment.

It has since started snowing since I began this journal.  There is no way I am going outside now.  It is a good thing I have such a comfy place to hole up and be still.

Vision Board

A vision board is a visual reminder of what you want out of life.  It can include images or words that trigger excitement and passion in you.   It can be useful to create a vision board and place it in a space where you will frequently be reminded to go for your dreams.  The vision board is a powerful tool when you are trying to manifest changes, opportunities or experiences into your life.  Many people collect motivating images from magazines and make a collage but I like to create a digital vision board.  You can use Pinterest or a software program like Photoshop to create your own digital vision board.

Below you will find some ideas of what to include on your vision board as well as a couple examples from my board:

  • goals associated with your business or work (advancements, recognition, degrees, training, etc.)
  • health goals (food, exercise – I am learning how to eat even healthier and just took a great grains cooking class to move this goal forward)
  • financial goals (dollars in the bank, debts paid by a certain date, etc.  I have a picture of money growing on a tree that represents my residual income.)
  • social needs and relationships (I am attracting friends who get me and a personal assistant!)
  • hobbies or vacations you want to experience (I am sitting in Aruba as I write this post – every vision board I create has a picture of a tropical destination on it!)
  • quotes you love (Pinterest has hundreds of these!)
  • pictures of clothes, toys, or other fun things you want some day (I got my jogging stroller I wanted!  I found it used and an excellent shape at a garage sale!)

If you have ever thought, “I wish I could….”  put it on your board!

Pinterest is one of the easiest ways to create a digital vision board.  You can create boards for each aspect of your life.  For example, if you hope to travel or go on a vacation, you can pin your dream vacation photos onto that board.  You could also create one giant board that contained images representing your entire vision board.  I used Pinterest for a long time but found it did not meet my needs for two reasons.  One, it was too easy to “pin” any old image that half-way excited me.  I had dozens of pins that I liked but I was not truly focused on manifesting many of them into my own life.  My second challenge with my Pinterest Vision Board is that I did not go and review my vision daily – while it was conveniently online and very organized, there is something powerful to actually seeing your board and being forced to think about it throughout the day.

I now create my vision board using Photoshop but you could do a similar thing in PowerPoint, PicMonkey, or any software that allows you to place images in the file.

If you wish to create a vision board using Photoshop, I recommend beginning with a file that is 16 x 20 so you can create a poster of your vision board. If you are using PowerPoint, a letter size file will work just fine.

I use Google searches to find images that represent what I want in my life.  I put a variety of images on my board – some are easy like the fact that I want new kitchen towels.  Other images represent long term business or family goals.  I look for images that create a positive emotion inside me – they need to excite me from the get-go or they won’t be enough to motivate me when I see them later on.  As I find images, I use my mouse to right click and copy each image.  I then go into my software (Photoshop or PowerPoint) and paste the image or graphic on a single page document.  If you want to include several images, place the images nice and tight so there is room for your complete vision.  Be sure to save as you go so that you won’t lose your work.

Once you have created your vision board, you can print it out at home or use a photo service.

I send my 16×20 image to Costco and have a poster printed.  You will want to watch the cropping on Costco’s site when you do this to be sure you don’t lose the edges of your file when the poster is made.  (You could also leave a nice white border around the edges when you create your vision board.)  A large poster like this only costs a couple dollars to print.  I have mine posted in my bedroom on a magnet board.  I can easily add new images around my main vision board if I see something that excites me.  I also order a 4 x 6 print so that I can keep my vision board with me as I travel.

If you are using PowerPoint, you can create your file and then save it as a .jpeg if you want to be able to use a photo service to print it.

Creating a digital vision board and printing it is the easiest way to stay connected to your dreams.  Whether you choose to use old magazines or digital images, a Vision Board is a fun way to motivate yourself into action.

The following books have helped me learn about energy.  They are in no particular order but each has contributed to my education in some way.  The list is not comprehensive and I will add more titles in due time.


The Energy Bus – Jon Gordon

Light in the Wilderness – Catherine M. Thomas

Mutant Message Down Under – Marlo Morgan

Energy Medicine for Women: Aligning Your Body’s Energies to Boost Your Health and Vitality – Donna Eden

Drawing on the Powers of Heaven – Grant Von Harrison

The Message – Lance Richardson

Love, Medicine, & Miracles – Bernie S. Siegel

Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust – Immaculee Illibagiza

Secret of Instantaneous Healing – Harry D. Smith

A Scriptural Discussion of Light – Allen J. Fletcher

Energy Medicine – Donna Eden

The Amazing Laws of Cosmic Mind Power – Joseph Murphy

Your Body Doesn’t Lie – John Diamond

Do I Have to Give Up Me to be Loved by God – Paul Margaret

The Hidden Messages in Water – Masaru Emoto

The LDS Gospel of Light – B. Grant Bishop

Feelings Buried Alive Never Die – Karol K. Truman

Your Right to Fly – James E. Melton

Emotional Energy Factor – Mira Kirshenbaum

Change Your Questions, Change Your Life – Wendy Watson Nelson

Inner Bonding – Margaret Paul, PhD

Through His Eyes – Virginia H. Pearce

Energy Medicine – Donna Eden

Remembering Wholeness – Carol Tuttle

Power vs. Force – David Hawkins

Anatomy of the Spirit – Caroline Myss

You Can Heal Your Life – Louise Hay

Heal Your Body – Louise Hay

Jackrabbit Factor – Leslie Householder

Hidden Treasures – Leslie Householder

“It is in the whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has meaning. Problems are the cutting edge that distinguishes between success and failure. Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. It is through the pain of confronting and resolving problems that we learn.” –M. Scott Peck, M.D.

Challenges and problems are part of this life. Both are inevitable and each of us eventually have the opportunity to decide how we will deal with the challenges that come our way. Lately, I have had some challenges but I am grateful because I know that I grow through new experiences. Here are some affirmations to use when you find yourself facing a new challenge.

  • I am courageous.
  • I am wise.
  • I use my courage and wisdom to create solutions.
  • I am teachable.
  • I am growing spiritually and mentally.
  • I am patient.
  • I am grateful for the opportunity to learn more about myself and develop new strengths.
  • I am creating a better future.
  • I am a problem solver.
  • I have all the talents and resources I need to resolve this challenge today.
  • I am open to learning and growing.
  • I am happy to have experiences that allow me to grow and develop into my best self.
  • I rise to meet life’s challenges.

Print this list and post in your home for those moments you need to remember your strengths.

Remember the Verizon commercial where the Verizon guy points out that he is backed up by a giant network?  Did you know that our ancestors are just like that?   I also have thought that if you consider how many ancestors are behind you (think of a pedigree chart), it does not take very long to have hundreds of angels cheering you on.

My final thoughts are because someone I know that does not believe in the help of angels to the same extent that I do…He feels that if angels are helping us so much, why is there still a struggle or how can I have a bad day if I am aware of the help of angels?   I have considered his important questions and come to a few conclusions.

First, this life was meant to give us earthly experiences and also to prepare us for our eternal destiny. It seems to me that those experiences are to build our strengths. Perhaps we will need those particular strengths in the future while we are on earth, or even in the life to come. It is valuable for us to learn we are stronger than we know, to realize our faith was sufficient – these lessons are not for God to see what we are made of (as He already knows), but for us to see we are better than we think we are.

Second, angels will not do what we can do for ourselves. We have our agency and we are capable people. We must at times, be like Nephi, and move forward not knowing beforehand how things will work out. But we have been promised that as we step forward and accept our circumstances, angels will help us and we will have our vision opened.:

All of you know that we believe in the mi

nistering of angels. You also know that angels will not do for us what we can do for ourselves. For them to do so would be contrary to the order of heaven. If angels will not do for you what you can do for yourself, be assured that the Holy Ghost will not do it either. It is not the design of heaven that we be rescued from all difficult situations. Rather, it is the system that we grow up and learn to handle them.

The sense of being overwhelmed is very much a part of the jour

ney. The power with which God clothes us in His holy temples does not suppose that the journey we have been called to make will be an easy one.

Nevertheless, the path we seek will always be clearly marked by the covenants we have made and the callings we have received. It is in the accepting of our lot and moving forward with what the Lord has asked of us that we discover that the Holy Ghost enjoys our company, angels feel constrained to join us, and the heavens open to our vision. (Joseph Fielding McConkie, BYU Devotional)

Finally, there are times where I think we could have additional help, but our stubbornness, our personality, or attitude get in the way. Joseph Smith said, “If you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrained from being your associates.” If I want to mope around and feel sorry for myself, I am not living

up to my privileges and will likely not feel the help of angels. In that situation, angels may or may not be “round about” trying to bear me up, but it will not matter if I am too busy focusing on my lot rather than on the many blessings I have available to me.

And because he hath done this, my beloved brethren, have miracles ceased? Behold I say unto
you, Nay; neither have angels ceased to minister un

to the children of men. Moroni 7:29

The fact is that angels are here and miracles are still happening, I just hope that my eyes are open enough to see the miracles that are happening every day.

While I strongly believe in the help of angels, it is secondary to the constant companionship that comes from the gift of the Holy Ghost.  President Wilford Woodruff said to J. Golden Kimball: “Now, Brother Kimball, I have had visions, I have had revelations, I have seen angels, but the greatest of all is that still small voice.”  I love that we have the gift of the Spirit with us and that we also have a huge network of angels backing us up!

“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”

R. Buckminster Fuller
1895-1983, Architect, Author and Inventor

I love that a simple  healing session makes the existing reality obsolete. I love seeing my clients release their old models and move into a higher energy that reflects their true selves and inherent goodness. True Change happens in an easy non-evasive way through both private and group sessions.

Clients often wonder why Belief Breakthrough sessions are needed to bring about true change.  Making changes without the support of belief reprogramming is like building a new house without architectural plans or a foundation, using scraps and remnants from old building projects.   Our spirits yearn to be set free from old patterns, beliefs, limitations, and blocks.  Energy healing is the fastest way to remove those barriers so that we can quickly make changes and build the lives we want.